No Worries

On a quiet day off, I found myself rereading my old journals. I have journaled for years. I am not methodical in my journaling. Months may go by between each entry. Some entries span pages, and others barely take up a line or two. But I have always scribbled down notes and thoughts and prayers since elementary school.

So I pored over these pages, seeing my old self now embalmed in scratches of ink. I read mostly from college journals and seminary journals. Honestly, a great deal of it was somewhat embarrassing. The worries and wars of my 20-year-old self were not particularly noble. And, I tend to journal when I am in one mood: down. (I have often, half-jokingly, worried aloud to Jess that our kids will come across these old journals and conclude I was the most depressed person in the world)!

But silly adolescent ramblings aside, the overwhelming takeaway from this journey through the past was thankfulness for God’s provision and the conclusion that the worry wasn’t worth it.

The worry wasn’t worth it!

So many entries were about this or that unanswered question. Direction, jobs, relationships, school, and so forth…so many unknowns bothered me, and yet, looking back, each issue was resolved in time and with grace. Many questions I simply could not know then, but God would answer them all in his perfect timing. While giving these concerns to the Lord was certainly right and good, any second I spent in worry wasn’t worth it. God was and is faithful.

I come away from these journals determined to pray more and worry less.

How about you? Does the rearview mirror reveal the same for you?

Published by

Derek Griz

I am a Christian, a husband, a father, and a pastor (Immanuel Church). I write from those perspectives. Connect with me on Twitter (@derekgriz).

2 thoughts on “No Worries”

  1. Hi Derek, as u know I am a new reader to your Blog and just now read this entry and was surprised to find no comments. I am not sure what that is indicative of, maybe not many people keep a journal, maybe because of your candor they were not sure how to reply. I keep a journal and like you it is not daily and it seems to go in spurts but again like you every so often I go back and read it. In doing this I find peace and calm. I see that the dots of my life have been connected in such a beautiful way to bring me to a better understanding of God. My dots are definitely not in a straight line and do seem to maybe even wander ( probably because of my stubbornness and lack of faith ) but they are in a general direction. This gives me hope that in the future when I look back at my journal again I will see that in spite of myself God is bringing me ever so much closer to be him.

    1. Terry,

      I love this: “I see that the dots of my life have been connected in such a beautiful way to bring me to a better understanding of God.” That is a great way to put it! – Dots that form a pattern in hindsight. It seems hindsight is the ultimate revealer, even of seemingly random dots in our lives. Oh for the patience to wait for the final picture!

      dg

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